Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Experiments





Motherhood requires the use of the Scientific Method every day. You are presented with a problem (typically several), you propose a hypothesis, you set up and facilitate the experiment and then you receive your outcome. Sadly, my outcomes are seldom what I intend, as proven this morning at 1:00 am.
My experiment went a little something like this...
I really wanted C and K to go back to sharing a room (in separate cribs). We split them up 2 months ago to get them sleeping through the night. It worked initially but has never been consistent until recently. We have had perfect nights for over a week. Therefore, I hypothesized that I could put them back together again. It took monumental effort to carry out my experiment. I went to Home Depot yesterday for the third time this week and finally acquired the right parts I needed to assemble the dinosaur crib that we borrowed from my parents. (Just because it is old, does not mean we are not grateful. :))
I spent the majority of yesterday afternoon assembling said dinosaur while two toddlers shook, rattled and rolled between and underneath all the loose parts. I think Cole may have swallowed a bolt. Time will tell.
So, I finally got the blasted crib put together and was ready to test my theory with the afternoon nap. Bad idea. I will spare you the details, but within 10 minutes, Cole was back in the pack 'n play in the guest room and Keith was so distraught that he never took an afternoon nap. I therefore never got a shower yesterday, which is beside my point but still important for dramatic effect.
I decided to reattempt my experiment at bedtime. Since Brent was out of town on business, it was a good night to test my theory. After about 45 minutes of chatting, yelling and trading pacifiers, they both finally fell silent and after an hour, they were both asleep. Victory!!!
After dumbing myself with 2 hours of The Bachelor, I retired to bed. My scientific hopes were dashed when my dream was interrupted by a child shouting for attention. I raced into the nursery just hoping that Cole had not awakened Keith. But once again, I was very wrong. He was leaning over so far into Keith's crib and yelling into his ear, it's a wonder he didn't fall on top of his brother or at the very least, deafen him.
There was no chance of them going back to sleep at this point, so I had to split them up again. Both boys screamed since each had lost his bed buddy, but seriously, I had to get some sleep. I didn't really mind that they had interrupted my dream though. It was really more of a nightmare. I had given birth to identical girl triplets. If night awakenings aren't enough birth control, dreams like that certainly are.


I came home the other day to find Brent teaching the boys how to carry out some experiments of their own. They were catapulting toys from the top of the banister--all under the pretense of teaching his sons "cause and effect".
This was all well and good until Cole realized that his favorite bear was now in the entryway and he would have to slide down the entire flight of stairs to retrieve him. I guess he is learning dad's lesson the hard way.

8 comments:

Kim said...

Seriously you are by far the most entertaining writer of all the blogs I read!!! Not that that is suppose to be a grand prize, but I love reading your writing. Your sense of humor is greatly appreciated especially in a career of mundane tasks. Truth be told if you really want them to share a room you are going to have to let them cry it out in the middle of the night until they learn to 1. ignore each other 2. go back to sleep bc the novelty of their best bud right next to them will eventually wear off and 3. my last bit of advice invest in a good pair of earplugs or loud fan. After a week of room sharing boot camp it'll work it self out:) Good luck!!!

Darrell said...

Darc--you are a terrific writer. Great post!

chelsea said...

YOu are like a posting machine--don't stop as it adds spice to my mundane days!! Second, you can't ever talk about the Bachelor like that--there are something we just don't joke about--emotionally distressed women faunning over a man they have known for 2 weeks is one of them. Third, I miss you guys--I posted my OR pics on the shuttfly page and I am really starting to rethink the nanny idea. Summer 2010 Nanny Chelsea is coming your way. You know if you had the triplets by then I would really be useful:)

Lindsay Rosas said...

scientific method :) i love it! You are so creative! What a great post...can your boys get any more cute?!

The Veals said...

That is SO funny! At least they can sleep through the night...

Unknown said...

Love your family! Great post!

SLP said...

Seriously, soo funny.
Theo has taken to jumping off of furniture - dangerous but funny (video on the blog).

That said, I am soo sorry about the whole crib effort. Twins are MORE than twice the work:)

You are an AWESOME mom!

Sherene said...

What a great story! Miss ya Darcee! Keep an eye out for Elder Goatson too.